Guy that gives unnecessarily hard high-fives

Hey!

You're a cool friend! One of those guys everyone knows and everyone likes! You need a way to say hello, so instead of shaking hands, you give high-fives. Not just any high-fives, though...the HARDEST HIGH-FIVES IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!

Dude! Stop it! When I go in for a high-five I'm expecting a good hit with small a small sting-back factor. With you, though, I get hit harder than a crash test dummy at high speeds. My hand turns red, pain shoots down to my elbow and I'm partially numb for five minutes. Not cool!

Hey guy that gives unnecessarily hard high-fives! YOU'RE A BIG JERK!

Girl that works in customer service

Hey!

You work in customer service! Maybe it's a clothing store, maybe a coffee shop...maybe you're even a cashier in the grocery store. I'm not saying I want to engage in conversation with you, but a simple "hello" would be nice to hear! I'm not being a bitch to you, you shouldn't be a bitch to me. Say hello! It's easy!

Hey girl that works in customer serivce! YOU'RE A BIG JERK!

Guy that stands in subway doors

Hey!

You're standing in the door of the subway! The train isn't crowded and there's a ton of room to move in, but you chose to stand right in the doorway! Do you move when the doors open? Nope! You just keep standing there, making everyone else move around you.

Hey guy that stands in subway doors! YOU'RE A BIG JERK!